November 26th, 2000


So British

Backstory: There's this diarist on Teen Open Diary who was really ticking me off for a while. This was written in response to him.
For those of you who aren't awake yet, there's a new Brit in town. Pedigree Chum. He gets his jollies insulting Americans. Isn't that so British?
Does anyone else use that phrase? My friends all do, but then we're all incredibley racist, especially with each other. If my friend buys something on sale, we say "That is soooo Asian!" Especially if it is something she otherwise would never purchase. You see, most of us have a little asian in us (Marisa is Filipino, Kate is Vietnemese, I'm half Chinese, etc...) and we see no harm in it.

When Davy first came to America, he would use the phrase "That is soooo American," to tease us. Like F*R*I*E*N*D*S. We were watching the episode where Pheobe gets the chickenpox, I think. It was "soooo American." So was the Simpsons. So were the Monkees. On and on.

Then one day he asked me to explain American Identity. (He had to write an essay on it, and he figured it was easier to leech the answer out of me than do the work himself.) I asked him what British Identity was. He didn't understand the question. I mean, I got some answer, but it was truly stupid. I told him that "Kiddo, that is soooo British." And the phrase was born. It has come to mean that something is asinine in a way that makes one think of England.

The Royal Family is soooo British. You need only to see Prince Charles to know that. Inbreeding for all those centuries really wasn't a good idea. Are You Being Served? is soooo British. It gets shown on public broadcasting over here, although whether that's good or not remains to be seen. Mercantilism. Odd spelling habits. Bad teeth. It's all soooo British.

Don't get me wrong - great stuff has come out of Britian. Harry Potter. The Beatles. Shakespeare. And the English are so polite. But they have their problems too, and one of them is the fact that so many people from that country seem to have this superiority complex when it comes to dealing with America.

All because we were once their colonies, and we were *gasp* rude enough to rebel and form our own country. Give me a break. We're a continent, and you're a tiny little island. It would've happened eventually. GET OVER IT. Admittedly, if you'd held on to us you might've stayed a superpower, but that isn't the point. In fact, I don't think I even have one.

I should stop, anyway. Davy's going to take me to watch The Grinch and if he sees this we might end up seeing some awful British film instead.

So I will save my comments on the phrase "bloody" and Jack the Ripper for some other time.
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Bushed & Gored to Death

Bush won the Electoral College. He'll be the President, most likely, and Gore will not. At this point, who cares?

There is, for all practical purposes, no difference between the two. Neither of them ran to win, they ran to beat the other party.

I wish Nadar or Buchanan had had a chance of winning. Both of them are extreme, but at least they ran for a reason other than a party win.

I wish John Hagelin of Natural Law had gotten a fair amount of media coverage. He is the one who I stand behind. He would've represented me and my opinions.

We need to beat this two party system. But no one is willing to. Why? Because it requires independant research, so that you know more party candidates than the guys with the most money.

And alas, alack...Americans have no time to do that. Or they won't make the time. It's all the same in the end.

We reap what we sow.