May 2nd, 2001


Mr. Butler!

I have a butler, isn't that cool? He's a gay homosexual cowboy, but other than that he's mostly normal. That, and he doesn't do any work like a good butler should - but he isn't paid, either.
I'm going to tell you about my butler because he's reading my diary as I write. And for some reason, it seemed really funny or ironic or something to write about him.

Anyway, he's very generous. Why? 'Cuz he gives me m&ms. Granted, he doesn't have much choice in the matter because I just break into his backpack and take them, but still. Butlers are supposed to feed their masters. But he wouldn't give me his raspberry tootsie roll pop, and for that he should be given his pink slip.

But I couldn't decide whether the slip should have ruffles, lace, or sequins. So he gets to stay for now.

Go read his diary on TOD: spellbinder

I think that's the name, anyway.
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