April 30th, 2009

piranha - bluebird

Writer's Block: Swine Times

Are you worried about catching the swine flu? Do you have a plan for avoiding contagion or dealing with quarantine?
Nope!
I am far too foolish to worry about catching diseases.  My friend Amanda says today she has flu-like symptoms and the first thing I say is "Great!  Hey, let's hang out!" so clearly, avoiding the virus is something I can't be counted on to do.  I think antibacterial hand gels are silly.  If I drop food on the floor, I firmly believe in the 5-second rule.  I don't always wash my hands before eating.  I am exposed to new people on a daily basis at work or at school.  I keep hoping that someone at DeAnza will get a the flu so classes will be suspended for a week, just like they were at Branham High School after a teenager was diagnosed on Tuesday.  Oh, alma mater.  A week off of school is sweet.

 

Clearly, I'm going to get swine flu.  I accept this.  I figure I'll get it when I fly to Boston, or fly back; everyone knows that an airplane flight is a disease waiting to happen.   I just hope I get one of the mild cases; it would not be a terribly impressive way to die.