In two-inch tall letters, the headline SWEET! topped my newspaper's front page today. It was talking about the NCAA regionals, which are taking place in San Jose and are apparently deserving of a 12-page spread.
(We didn't give that much coverage to the freakin' Olympics.)

The major article was "Where is all of our basketball talent?" and bemoaned the fact that San Jose does not produce champion basketball players.

Is this the best news we have to report about in this city? Was there truly nothing else happening in the world today?
Nothing happening in Pakistan?
No developments in prisoner negotiations in Afghanistan?
No battles in Iraq?
Any major cocaine raids by the Coast Guard? (And how is the War on Drugs faring these days, anyway?)

Guess not, since we needed to devote twelve pages to a sport that San Jose, according to the article, doesn't even care about.

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P.S. SJ Mercury, we don't have basketball players because there are no black people here, and basketball is a poor man's sport. Rich white CEOs of dot-coms don't play basketball.
Also we have Mexicans. They like soccer. Just, y'know, pointing it out.