I gave him a t-shirt from Glennz Tees with a Fat Flash, because I like to express affection with obese superheroes:
"How is this related to Valentine's Day?" you ask.
Uhm...well..the Flash is fat because he ate too many chocolates? On Valentine's Day?--
Just to continue taking the fat superhero thing to a disgusting new level:
Now that you're completely and totally scarred, I'll just sneak out the back door and leave you feeling very, very unclean.