Resident: My daughter might give birth while she's visiting.
Me: How exciting!
Resident: I think she should just do it at home. It'd be easier.
Me: Could be.
Resident: I could help her. I used to help with births all the time!
Resident: Yup, I grew up on a dairy farm.
Resident: Not much difference between a calf and a baby. Or a cow and a-
Me: I hope you didn't tell your daughter that!
Resident: Naw, I wouldn't say it to her face.
Resident: Yeah, it didn't go over so well with my wife thirty years ago...