Turns out, not so much!
According to the Internets, bōbà is Chinese slang for large breasts.
Surely one of my authentic Chinese friends - meaning the kind that actually speak Chinese, not folks like me who only tap into their Chinese roots when ordering food or trying to finagle a li sei envelope at New Year's - could have told me this.
** Boba/bubble tea, often commonly referred to as pearl tea, is a milk tea with balls of tapioca mixed in. They come in a wide variety of tea flavors, but popular variations include strawberry, peach, melon, lychee and taro.